But Doctor, I
Am Pagliacci
Script: Magdalene Visaggio
Pencils, Inks, Cover: Sonny Liew
Colors: Chris Chuckry
Letters: Todd Klein
Cover Price: $3.99
On Sale Date: April 11, 2018
**NON SPOILERS AND SCORE AT THE BOTTOM**
Why, it seems an…eternity since we last saw an issue of this book! Just kidding, it
feels like it’s only been four weeks. Which is actually how long it’s been.
Look, I was pressed to make some kind of reference to the word “eternity’ and I
biffed it. Okay? Are you happy now? I screwed up. But I am totally honed and in
deep concentration for my review of Eternity
Girl #2! Just check it out below and find out!
Explain
It!
What would you create if you could control
reality? A dog with three tails? An endless ice cream sundae? A dog with four tails??? Fact is, once you’ve
filled your coffers and vanquished your enemies, there isn’t a whole lot more
you can do. Sure, you can freak everyone out by turning grass pink and making
the sun look like Ernest Borgnine’s face, but you won’t have done anything
substantial beyond an ethereal prank. This is the situation facing Caroline,
the shape-shifting mutant who has recently learned that she can control time
and space. Somehow. And in some capacity. We’re not sure of the details yet,
but it looks like she can sort of make weird things happen. So she’s sort of
like Elon Musk, but with red talons for feet.
This doesn’t, however, preclude her from
attending a fairly lame stand-up routine with her one friend, Dani. This comes
in the form of a one-woman show who laments her body image, something with
which the disfigured Caroline is well familiar. When the comedian says she
wants to kill herself, Caroline gets up to leave—partly because this routine
seems to suck, but also because she wants to kill herself, but she can’t.
Caroline is immortal. All she can do is change reality. Or destroy it. At
least, according to the mentally-projected ghost of Madame Atom.
She explains that, periodically, the universe
resets, and multiple versions of people are created—even the Eternity Girl
herself. If this sounds familiar, then that’s because you read comic books,
where creating multiple realities and restarting universes is part of the
publishing plan. Madame Atom has a new plan however: stop the machine. Destroy
the universe. No more disparate versions of people, no more anything. Destroy the universe and
destroy yourself. These are thoughts Caroline mulls over during the post-show
dinner with Dani, who finally has it out with Caroline and tells her to stop
being such a sad sack—it’s time to take action. And you know what? Dani is
right. So Caroline hops in a cab and takes it from Manhattan to Long Island
(not cheap folks) to Director Stephen Sloan, who headed the project that
ultimately turned Caroline into a monster. And there, she ends a universe—that belonging
to him and his family, when Caroline collapses his house upon them and walks
away.
Another bizarre, somewhat difficult-to-parse
issue—I didn’t even get into the stuff where Caroline vanquishes fake Galactus
as an allegory to killing Director Sloan—but I am enjoying this story and its
trappings. You don’t need to get me to walk very far to read a story about
comic book multiverses, and while this isn’t giving us a world run by
anthropomorphic rabbits (yet), the implications are still cool, and Caroline’s
angst over being immortal and all-powerful somehow ring true. Despite the fact
that I am neither immortal nor remotely powerful. That’s the wish-fulfillment
inherent in comic books, I suppose. The art works just fine, though it isn’t
anything very exciting. It could certainly be worse, which is something I might
say about this comic book as a whole.
Bits and
Pieces:
A kind of clunky issue that manages to bump against some comic book themes that will be familiar to the seasoned reader. Caroline Sharp's malaise is warranted, but wearing thin. The reader isn't supposed to be as morosely bored as the character they're reading about.
7/10
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