But I Want My False Flag Operation Now!
Writer:
Dan Abnett
Artist:
Philippe Briones
Colorist:
Gabe Eltaeb
Letterer:
Pat Brosseau
Cover:
Brad Walker, Andrew Hennesy & Gabe Eltaeb
Cover Price:
$2.99
On Sale Date: November 16, 2016
**NON SPOILERS AND SCORE AT THE
BOTTOM**
I want Aquaman to get an Aquacat. No, I don’t mean a
catfish, I mean a new kind of sea life that has the body of a fish and the head
of a cat. And maybe the two front paws of a cat, that would be cute. It could
leap out of the water with a “mew!” and submerge all the way to Atlantis to
curl up on Arthur’s lap. Should there be an Aquadog? I don’t think there should
be an Aquadog. Just an Aquacat, that’s all that matters. I regret to inform you
that this issue has no such Aquacat. But it does have some wacky Aquaman action
and by that I mean you get to see him with his face swollen up like an overripe
beet. But let me not give away everything in the intro! Read on for my review
of Aquaman #11!
You’ll recall that last issue ended with Joanna
Stubbs of the Royal Navy informing Mera that her betrothed was messed up, but
good, during a squabble with Shaggy Man. So where do you think Aquaman is now?
Why, at the local hospital, of course! I thought this was a nice touch, to have
him set up in Amnesty Bay instead of on some gilded magic doctor in Atlantis
that would scan him back to health. It highlights his air breathing heritage,
as well as the town’s willingness to help Aquaman when he’s messed up. And I
mean messed up. Mera finds out as
much when she strides into his room and sees the state of him. It looks like
his face has hemorrhoids. She’s very caring, in her assertive and curt way, and
the two of them recap the last few issues for a couple of pages. Mera tells
Arthur about the prophecy that the Widowhood warned her about, and Arthur says
he’s not about to listen to no Widowhood, he’s his own man. World-killing
prophecy or not, he’s going to have sex with her.
Mera tells Aquaman all about N.E.M.O. and Black Manta
and all the other junk Joanna Stubbs told her at the very end of the last
issue, when in walks the Justice League, like a bunch of big shots. “Oh, is
this your private room, Arthur? You won’t mind if we just barge the fuck right
in, will you? Doo dee doo!” I think this was supposed to be a tension-filled
scene, like will the Justice League bust Aquaman for terrorism and such? And
the obvious answer is, no they’re not going to arrest Arthur, particularly not
out of a hospital bed, I mean these are heroes not Gestapo for crying out loud.
Even Superman gives him a hearty handshake, and I’m wondering if I was supposed
to really think they would turn their backs on him. Superman and Aquaman had a
kind of mean-spirited battle, and Aquaman gave up his Justice League card to
teleport Shaggy Man into deep space, but I didn’t think they were really mad at each other, you know?
Sometimes people in close proximity with one another argue, but it doesn’t mean
mommy and daddy broke up because you were bad. Where was I? Superman goes so
far as to announce on the evening news that Aquaman is a swell guy, which
probably landed him like a million endorsement offers.
At the penthouse headquarters of the nefarious
N.E.M.O., Black Jack and Black Manta are watching Aquaman’s fortune with great
and very evil anger. Black Manta is sick of pussyfooting around by sending
Shaggy Man after Amnesty Bay and faking Atlantean terrorist attacks—he’s going
to shame Aquaman and fulfill the Widowhood’s prophecy by launching a full-out
phony Atlantean attack on dry land! Now that’s killing two birds with one
stone! Back in Atlantis and looking less like a bunch of grapes, Aquaman and
Mera are showing Joanna Stubbs—who prefers to be called “Jo,” though I may
never call her that—around the place (she is wearing a super Atlantean
visitor’s suit), and she’s suitably stunned. She explains that she knew about
N.E.M.O. because her evil dad tried to recruit her to the team. She kept it
under wraps because of her daddy issues, but decided to come forward and break
his tender heart because, I mean, it’s Aquaman. Just then, without being
ordered by Arthur, Atlantis launches a full-scale attack on dry land! Now you
just know that’s the work of Black
Manta!
So this looks to be the last of the decompressed
issues before the big action, and I liked it well enough. All the pieces have
to click into place, and it may sound strange but I felt reassured that Aquaman
knows about N.E.M.O., instead of being punked by them for another eight issues.
I’m also glad to see Joanna Stubbs hanging around, because she’s like Mera’s
Etta Candy. “Crikey.” I also love how that seems to piss Jim off a lot. The
whole Justice League reveal didn’t ring true to me, but really I never thought
Superman and Aquaman were on the outs. I’ve enjoyed these last four issues,
mainly because they weren’t redundant and didn’t keep trying to up the stakes
with every issue. Still, I’m about ready to starting seeing shit blow up.
Bits and
Pieces:
The final preparations are made for what looks to be a real humdinger of a city-destroyin' slugfest! This issue reads a little slow, but we learn some important information, and more importantly characters learn things we already knew. I've enjoyed this lull before the storm, now it's time for some good ol' over-the-top comic book action!
7/10
I sense the that the Deluge is going to be the B-movie version of Throne of Atlantis
ReplyDeleteI'm really tired of getting the same old story over and over
DeleteThe ads for The Deluge included the name of the event in the same font of Night of the monster men. Is that the sign of things to come?
ReplyDeleteBoy, I hope not!
Delete