Sinn Begins
Art By:
Mauricet, Inaki Miranda, Dawn McTeigue, Ray McCarthy, Mark Roslan, Hi-Fi
Lettered By:
Dave Sharpe
Cover Price:
$3.99
On Sale Date: August 31, 2016
**NON SPOILERS AND SCORE AT THE
BOTTOM**
Yo, we're
not here to preach because we're not ministers
We're
telling like it is ‘cause Ren and Dre is like sinister
Reality
speaks for itself when it's spoken
A basehead
cluck can't blame nobody for smoking
Yo, bullets
flying, mothers crying, brothers dying
Lying in the
streets, that's why we're trying
To stop it
from falling apart and going to waste
And keeping
a smile off of white face
N.W.A. never
preaching, just teaching
The
knowledge of the streets to each and
All that
don't understand, that's why we came
To let you
know that we're all in the same gang
Welcome to Secret Origin featuring
Harley Sinn, where we learn about the poor widdle girl that wasn’t loved
correctly by her douchebag parents. She was born to an ultra-wealthy real
estate magnate that is not Donald Trump but is totally Donald Trump and a
trophy wife who were indifferent to her, so she lashed out and started doing
normal rebellious stuff: getting into fights, mouthing off to her teachers, and
shooting one of her classmates. Not Donald Trump would use his money and
influence to cover up her sadistic ways, as Sinn points out it was just another
way not to deal with her directly. Hey Harley Sinn, ever consider that maybe
you weren’t interesting enough? I mean, most kids are so BOR-ring, you have to
have a good buzz going just to spend an uninterrupted hour with them. After
Harley Sinn burns down her house, killing two people, her parents send her away
to a remote island to live a life of indulgent, solitary luxury. That’s a
punishment??? But I do understand the subtle implication that Sinn’s parents
are so detached from and unable to confront her that they would literally send
her away to a deserted island.
Meanwhile, if you will recall, the Gang
is on said deserted island and beset by a trio of robots that resemble Power
Girl, Poison Ivy, and Catwoman. And they are so awesome. Like, can we have some toys made up right away? And maybe
a Harley Quinndroid & Robo-Friends
Action Hour cartoon show? Each of them has some cool-ass weapons, too:
Poison Ivy-bot has some electrified fines that she uses to whip the crap out of
Bolly Quinn, Power Girl-bot has boob missiles that…well, it’s pretty
self-explanatory. And Catwoman-bot, she’s a robot, which really is cool enough.
Plus it looks like she shoots lasers out of her hands or something. Point is,
the Gang is no match for this trio, so Harlem gives the order for everyone to
run away!
Back to the tortured drama of Harley
Sinn, the torturer: on La Isla Mal Chica, Sinn is attended by a small, rotating
staff that are not allowed to form an emotional bond with Harley Sinn. They try
to establish that remotely through a television set, which makes sense because
the only time I feel anything approaching an emotion, it’s when I’m watching
those animal shelter fundraising commercials with the Sarah MacLaughlin song.
Eventually, Sinn gets off the island by threatening and then killing the
regular supply drop, and confronts her father Not Trump by way of blackmailing
him. Like all good unskilled heiresses, this led her down a path of body
modification, drugs and drinking, even as her own mother died from liver
failure. At that point, Not Trump reached out to his daughter and, for the
first time, formed something approaching a daddy/daughter relationship and HEY
NOT LIKE THAT YOU SICKOS! I said this was Not
Trump.
Returning to the island, Harlem Quinn
leads the rest of the Gang across the minefield full of Eggy grenades that we
saw last issue. Commanding everyone to step gingerly, they make it across and
lead the Fembot 3 right into an explosive trap! The crew is feeling pretty good
about themselves, then we’re yoinked right back to Sinn’s origin: After a
while, Not Trump met a new trophy wife, and she had a daughter named Gina with
funny-colored hair. Sinn, having funny-colored hair herself, gets along with
Gina immediately, and before long they are committing minor vandalism, like all
young couples do. Sinn and Gina are in love, and therefore plan for a future
free of drugs and petty crime, to the extent that Sinn gets a job in her
daddy’s office. Unfortunately, Gina is unable to pimp her stepdad so she dies
of a heroin overdose. Her stepmom blames Sinn—at her wedding to Not Trump, of
course—and Sinn strangles her for a little while before bouncing. Drifting
alone and heartbroken, Sinn determines she is going to end it all, until she
sees a certain article in the local paper…oh, I’ll just tell you now, it’s
something about Harley Quinn. Speaking of whom, the Gang of Harleys has
stumbled upon Harley herself, up a tree to get away from some vicious
goat-rats. The gang rushes in to save Harley, which Carli and Harvey do by
running away to grab some of the weaponry from the junked robots, which they
then use to defeat the goat-rats. Still with me here?
In the past, Sinn is immediately captivated by
Harley, and sees in her a vision of her beloved Gina. Sinn begins stalking
Harley, and even takes out some hitmen contracted to kill Harley without her
even knowing. It’s around now she starts wearing the Sugar Skull makeup with
wacky Betty Boop hair, and sees a classified ad asking people to come try out
for the Gang of Harleys. She doesn’t get in, and, because Sinn is obviously
bananas, harbors deep resentment and a desire for vengeance. So that’s pretty
much when she kidnapped Harley, I suppose, and started this whole mess. Back to
Harley and the Gang, no longer threatened by robots or goat-rats, they chill
out and act all nice to each other, which is a little disconcerting. Even more
unsettling is that Harley is rendered in an awfully cute way, almost Manga
style. It seems incongruous with the rest of the art and looks really off to
me. Just as Harley reinvigorates the crew with a pledge to kick Harley Sinn’s
ass, we see Sinn offering a gang of menacing thugs ten million dollars for the
head of Harley Quinn!
Sometimes you don’t really see how
insane a comic book is, until you have to describe it. This whole thing is so
wacky, I half-expect Joe Besser to step out of the jungle and do his Stinky
routine. (Look it up, kids.) I like the Gang, I like the situation, I really liked those DC Lady Bots, but
Sinn…I don’t know if I needed to know all this about her. I mean, it shows that
she was a human being, before succumbing to Tim Curry from the Rocky Horror Picture Show cosplay. But I don’t really feel
sympathetic towards her, nor do I think her story is really too gut-wrenching.
Maybe that’s the point of the whole thing and we’ll find out next issue.
Mauricet does a pretty good job for most of the issue, but there are some
panels that look a little rushed. And the way Harley Quinn is rendered at the
end looks way out of place. I’ve taken this miniseries to the penultimate
issue, so I’m not going to jump off now, but this one was definitely the
weakest of the bunch.
Bits and Pieces:
7/10
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