Monster
Director: Paul Edwards
Writers: Danny Cannon
Air Date: May 9, 2016
*This review contains spoilers! Score and Non-Spoilers at the bottom!*
You ever get that feeling you shouldn’t enjoy something, but you do it anyway? Well, I actually have been legitimately enjoying Gotham this season, even though the show took a baseball bat to what is considered canon. Actually no, they took the SWORD OF SIN to the canon. To those who didn’t see last week, this show’s version of Azrael had arrived and tried to kill Gordon for being a sinner. With the combined efforts of the police, and Barnes going one on one with a pipe, he’s unmasked as the resurrected Theo Galavan, brought back by Hugo Strange. Gordon is able to expose him to the rest of Gotham, and now Tabitha, Theo’s sister, wants to fix whatever Hugo did to his mind. Is this a lost cause? Or will Theo turn against his master when his mind clears?
We open with Bullock and Gordon leading a team with warrants to search Strange’s office at Arkham, knowing well it was him who created Azrael. Unfortunately for them, Hugo had already shredded the documents and orders them to leave until they get the proper paperwork. With that lead cut, the pair decides that the best chance to find Theo is to go to his sister. When they find her, she’s attempting to leave the city in fear of her brother’s new outlook. She explains that her family told stories of the ancient assassin Azrael, and that his blade was passed down in the Order of St. Dumas, and that her grandfather is keeping it in his crypt with the rest of the family.
When the trio arrives at the crypt, the crack opens the tomb and find that the sword was indeed with her grandfather… and Bullock actually makes a point that they are now grave robbers and THAT’S WRONG?! Bullock, you promote beating criminals, but the moment that grave robbing is involved, you(who if we remember never believes in the magic mumbo jumbo) get freaked out?! Anyway, Azrael finds them, and after beating down both Gordon and Bullock, it’s Tabitha who is able to pull him out and remind him of who he is. That he is Theo Galavan… and that he was raised by the order of St. Dumas… to kill the son of Gotham… Bruce Wayne… Thanks, Tabitha. Thanks a lot. Theo stabs her, calls her a traitor and goes off to find Bruce, with Gordon right on his tail.
Meanwhile Bruce goes to find Selena and tried to convince her to help him to expose Strange, but obviously, she’s skeptical about the whole resurrection thing. However, Bruce then brings up a very good point with its resurrection record: Arkham has Bridgit, her friend who was a pyromaniac. Selena decides to go in alone and sends Bruce home. She finds her way into Arkham, and as she is navigating through the air conditioning vents, she runs into Edward, who is trying to get out. She agrees to help him if he can point her in the direction of where she can find her friend, to which Edward reluctantly agrees.
Jim calls Alfred and warns him of what's coming and when Bruce arrives home, the pair begin to cut all the lights to the house so they have an advantage. There’s just one problem though... He’s already in the house. CUE HORROR THEME MUSIC! Alfred begins opening fire on Azrael, but as expected, it does nothing. WHICH IS WHY BRUCE TOSSES A SWORD HIS WAY! Alright! Time for an epic sword fight right? Well… no… not really. Sadly when you have a sword fight in a cluttered study, it really cramps the action which ends quickly with close-ups and Alfred going out the window.
Back with Selina, we find her going through the asylum until she can find the elevator down to the lower levels. After the guards find that Edward escaped, it gives her the opening to head down where she finds the terrible creations left behind by Strange, including a menacing large man with green reptilian eyes which is an obvious nod to Killer Croc… YES, I WANT KILLER CROC IN GOTHAM! Especially with this whole experiment thing going on now, it's perfect! Alright back on track, we end her story as she does find Bridgit in a kickass new outfit, going by her new “uber-villain” name: FIREFLY!
Back with the Gotham Horror Story, we have Azrael cornering Bruce Wayne in the garage, still brandishing his new sword. He goes on and on about how the moment he slays Bruce the Wayne Plague will be eradicated from the world. He tries to get the drop on him, but Bruce gets one better on him… a car. Yup, Bruce rams him with a car through the garage outside… but just like most movie monsters that doesn’t stop him. As he is about to kill Bruce, Theo is shot several times by Jim who finally shows up at the last minute. Yup, two horror movie cliches in one ending… “But Jody,” you’re probably thinking, “Can’t Theo survive gunshot wounds?” I thought the same, which is why I wasn’t surprised when he got up, sword still in hand… Cue probably the cheesiest, stupidest, yet most badass way to kill a monster like Azrael. Penguin walks up, makes a quip about never entering a fight like this without the proper equipment… then Butch shows up with a rocket launcher and blows up, all the while THE most cliched sounding action movie music plays as it happens and they walk off… Yep… That's how Azrael dies… Let's just get to bits and pieces.
Bits and Pieces:
Well, remember that epic assassin that was on last week’s episode that took down officers with ease like the Batman that was meant to be? How about we take him away and replace him with a cookie cutter horror movie villain who lumbers around like Jason Voorhees in knight’s armor? No? Well too bad! And while you're at it, enjoy the cheesy cliched horror movie set up on one-half, and a way to wiggle Selena back into the plot in the other. It ain’t no raptor girl episode, but after the kick ass Azrael episode, this was not how it should have gone.
6/10
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