I Wonder, Wonder, Wonder, Wonder Girl
Written By:
Greg Pak
Art By:
Ian Churchill, Norm Rapmund, Tony Avina
Cover Price:
$2.99
Release Date: February 24, 2016
**NON-SPOILERS AND SCORE AT THE BOTTOM**
I must confess that I have not enjoyed much of the
Teen Titans since the advent of the New 52. Actually, "not enjoyed"
isn't really right...I've found it largely deplorable. It has seemed to evince
every complaint levied against the publishing initiative since it began in
2011. The costume redesigns were stupid, the characters unnecessarily mean and
cruel, their back stories convoluted and disheartening—the series has so far
consisted of a story about characters that are neither likable nor especially
heroic. A few years back there was another comic book suffering from similar ennui,
when a swell writer named Greg Pak came along and turned it all around. Wait a
second...Greg Pak is on this issue of Teen Titans! Do you think
he could bring it back to readability like he did Action? Or is it very
unlikely that the Lightning of Decent Comics could strike twice? Well if you
intend to find out, read on!
So like I said in the intro, I haven't been reading
Teen Titans regularly for a little while now. Thankfully, Greg Pak has seen fit
to re-introduce members of the team, which was very helpful to me, despite the
team being fairly well the same as I remember it. It's the thought that counts!
So let's run down the members of our crew with a Teen Titans roll call!
Tim Drake
aka Red Robin: Team Leader. Not to
be confused with Batman Beyond.
Tanya
Spears aka Power Girl: Genius who
gets big. Totally thought she was Bumblebee at first, but yeah, I remember that
thing where this girl got powers after Earth-2 Kara Zor-El went back through
that portal.
Miguel Jose
Barragan aka Bunker: Forms purple
constructs with his mind. Sort of a slow starter, character-wise. Has his
moments.
Rachel Roth
aka Raven: Half-Demon sorceress. Oh
yeah, I remember her too. I…I’m not going to go there. Keep an open mind,
Reggie, keep an open mind.
Garfield
Logan aka Beast Boy: Can transform
into any animal. Used to be colored red, now green. And yes, I know he was
green initially, before Flashpoint.
Cassie
Sandsmark aka Wonder Girl: The loose
cannon?
Sure seems that way this issue. The Titans are on the
lam, hiding from the cops in some remote cabin. I’m not sure what exactly they
did to run afoul of the law, but they’re always up to some shenanigans, those
kids. I’m sure it was some silly vandalism like stealing garden gnomes or
playing mailbox baseball. Cassie is hanging out in the woods, staring up at the
sky while a disembodied voice she can’t hear beckons…us, I guess, since we’re
the only ones who know what it is saying. Cassie strolls off of a cliff and
keeps hovering in the air while walking, which catches Tim Drake’s notice
because he’s a super detective. He tells Cassie to cool it, the Feds could be
watching, and to add to his paranoid a gunshot is heard. Turns out it’s two
guys hunting out of season, so each of the Titans appears and demonstrates
their powers, which scares the bejeezus out of them and they scamper out of the
forest. Very incognito, guys!
Seven hours later, they stop for gas in Wilmington,
Delaware. Tim tells everyone to lay low, so the very next thing Cassie does is
shoplift a pair of sunglasses. He chastises her but can’t you tell, Tim? She’s
confused about her identity! And I don’t mean in a teenaged girl way, I mean
she really doesn’t know who she is or where she comes from. Six hours later, at
the Pine Lodge Motel in Waynesboro, Virginia, Cassie is reflecting on the few
sepia-toned memories she has of her father, who tells her that they are
special—better—than others (because they have blond hair and blue eyes
obviously) and they need to keep it to themselves for the time being. She’s getting
stir crazy and whines to Tim, but he asks her to give him a little time to
clear their names and probably pay those outstanding parking tickets. She takes
off, and Tim confides in Miguel that he doesn’t trust Cassie since she used to
be a thief of rare artifacts—that’s how she got the ancient armor that gives
her powers, whatever they are. Is Tim Drake the most paranoid guy or what? You
don’t trust Cassie, you don’t trust a couple of hunters, who do you trust?
Batman?? Good luck, buddy.
Out in the woods, Cassie is hanging out with
Garfield, Rachel and Tanya literally just whipping trees into splinters with
her super whip. Tanya threatens to tell teacher, so Cassie says fuck this; I am
outta here. She hears that voice that she couldn’t hear from the beginning of
the book call her to London, so she flies off in a red streak of impetuousness
and narcissism. Nine hours later, she touches down in London and is immediately
greeted by…the Titans, who emerge from Raven’s feather cloak that can teleport
as well as tickle. Why do they drive around in a car, again? Tim warns Cassie
to cool it, and very loudly she says she’s here to meet her father! Just then
like three dozen were-hyenas come out of nowhere and attack the Titans, who
attack back to remind us that most of them are super-powered. After dispatching
these fools and falling through the roof, Cassie finds her father…’s head in a
horrified look, cast in plaster. She goes to it, sadly, but then some other
girl shows up claiming to be her cousin and says they’re both granddaughters of
Zeus! She asks Cassie to go flying with her, and they zoom off after a
hyena-man whaps Tim in the face to stop him from interfering. Just when Tim
gets up, he is yanked up from his silly cape by Wonder Woman, who looks really pissed off that someone
trashed her apartment!
Looks like Wonder Girl is being tenuously connected
to Wonder Woman, even though Cassie’s power set seems to be “whatever she feels
like at the moment.” I’m not sure if I find the idea of Wonder Girl’s Secret
Origin compelling enough to stretch out over several issues, but I’m interested
enough to give the next issue a look, which I guess is all that really matters.
The art is very good and the book is well-plotted throughout, and there are
some bits of dialogue that ring very true to what a bunch of teenaged goof-offs
might say, but as a whole this comic was just okay, which might be an
improvement over what came before.
Bits and
Pieces:
Greg Pak’s inaugural issue of Teen Titans has some nice character moments, and I very much
appreciated the blunt re-introduction of the team’s members, but there wasn’t a
ton in this comic book to get very excited about. The art is nice, and there
are worse ways to spend three bucks. I’m hoping this issue is laying the
groundwork for a great story to follow, but hopefully this doesn’t turn into
five issues of Wonder Girl being cranky until Rebirth kicks everything in the pants again. It’s happened before!
6.5/10
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