Art By: Scot Eaton
Cover Price: $2.99
Release Date: September 10, 2014
Oh Brother.................Eye
Our recap for this week is about Batman Beyond teaming up with Key, Coil and Plastique to break into Terrifitech. While this might seem odd that our future hero would team up with villains, he really needs to get info on Brother Eye and the other three just want to steal Mister Terrific's prototype Usphere, so there's something in it for everyone. Last week Lois Lane learned that the helmeted Superman was really Shazam and even though she really wants to tell the story on this charade, Stormguard asks her to keep it to herself. Hopefully Lois isn't a Chatty Cathy, or would it be a Reporting Rosie? Up in space Hawkman, Amethyst and Frankenstein have been captured by a Brainiac controlled Engineer and Ray Palmer has been left on the old Storm Watch HQ "The Carrier" for weeks, he probably has a volleyball best friend by now. The big thing to go down in this series would have to be the revelation that Brother Eye is actually in the Cadmus Island system and it seems to have used all the implants in the Earth 2 heroes locked up there to take over their bodies and now Lana Lang and Slade Wilson are hiding out trying to figure out what to do, while Fifty Sue is just chilling inside the complex having a conversation with this future world killer. That pretty much brings us up to speed for this week's issue, so let's check out what Five Years From Now has to offer us.
Explain It!:
Our story begins with Batman Beyond and this trio of toughs breaking into Terrifitech. Now while all of them have their own jobs to do, the bad guys believe that Batman Beyond will be creating a distraction, but what we see is him gassing the floor he's on and simply downloading information off the computers, to try and determine where the Brother Eye satellite is located. So since we see him lying about what he's doing here, it's no surprise that he lied about them all getting out of Terrifitech. That's right boys and girls our hero hasn't completely lost his marbles and before Coil and Key can make it out of the building Terry alerts the guards to their location. The strange part is I don't know what Plastique's part in the plan was, but instead of doing it she decided to find the room that her future borg self is being stored in, which I know from personal experience is never as cool as you expect it to be. Since Terry double crossed his new team, it stands to reason that he'd want to take out Plastique as well and at first it looks like Batman Beyond is going to Ray Rice Plastique.......... To Soon? But he sees her crying over her future body and decides to simply get her out of there. That's right folks, no one should ever have to look at their future dead borg body and still get arrested. Use that defense at your next hearing, see if it works and get back to me.
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| GROSS |
Back in Metropolis Lois Lane is trying to figure out whether she should run with the Shazam in Superman's clothing story and even after Stormguard last issue and now Shazam this issue explain to her that people need to believe that Superman still protects them, the lousy reporter side of her says "Fuck It!" and runs the story anyway. Now all I can imagine is the Justice League seeking retribution from The Fast Lane reporter and who knows, maybe in this dark future our heroes will be fucked up enough to actually go after her. I'm not saying I want this, but after seeing the dicks our heroes have become Five Years From Now, I wouldn't put it past them.
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| LOUSY TMZ |
Out in space, Ray Palmer is feeling a bit of the space madness (See The Ren & Stimpy Episode For This Reference) since he hasn't talked to his team in weeks and even though I don't see a volley ball anywhere I guess I can still enjoy this. Our former shrinking superhero is confronted by one of the storm lords, who apparently put the Storm Watch together to safeguard whatever the hell they're safeguarding these days. Now I'm not the most knowledgeable person when it comes to Storm Watch, so I don't really know who this storm lord is, but I can tell you that he wants Ray Palmer to lead a new Storm Watch and while we find out that shrinking over the years has done something to Ray's mind, the storm lord tells him to "Forget about it" and become something better than he is. The strange thing is we see Midnighter's body laying there and I don't know if he's saying "Rob that body over there and become a crazy Midnighter" or if I'm just projecting my own wants and needs. Time will tell............ but I'm still going with robbing the dead.
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| WHAT IS THAT? I DON'T KNOW WHAT THAT IS |
In the end Lana Lang and Slade Wilson are running for their lives from a Brother Eyed up Power Girl and they're really lucky they're important to the plot because come on............. dead. But before all the dead could happen Fifty Sue shows up and tells Brother Eye that these two are hers and even though this little monster has made a deal with the devil, I really dig her in this issue. Now I've done little else but bitch about my hate for this little snot nosed nightmare, but here, with her saving everyone I actually really liked her and you know what? I liked liking her. Weird. So this trio go back to find Grifter to cut the implant out of him and I guess we'll discover what Fifty Sue had to do to get Brother Eye off their back next issue, because that's it. Come back next week as we go "Back To The Future" and see what our heroes are doing or not doing. See you then.
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| AAAAWWWW LOOK AT HER NOT BEING TERRIFYING |
Bits and Pieces:
This has been a really good bunch of weeks. We've gotten answers, progressed the story and characters have become interesting and or likable. Now these seem like normal things that all comics should have, but boy was I worried about this title having none of these awhile back. For now all my fears have been put to rest as Futures End has continued to be great and I haven't had to yell at my cat about things it will never know or understand. Just another great issue with Scot Eaton on art duty this week and that's always a good thing. Go check it out and get lost in Five Years From Now.
8.7/10
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