Art By: Andres Guinaldo
Cover Price: $3.99
Release Date: April 23, 2014
Domestic Dispute
Like the way I've started every other Dark review since Forever Evil: Blight ended, when last we saw our Dark characters they survived Project Thaumaton, The Son's of Trigon, and even Nanda Parbat itself. Where this recap differs though is Constantine had completely abandoned his love and teammates to whatever end might come to them. You know real douchebag type stuff. But in the end Zatanna stepped up and the JLD got through the ordeal under new management. So let's jump into this issue, and see where the team goes from there, and see if we have any new faces joining our supernatural society of superheroes.
Explain It!:
As the story starts we see Constantine drinking his problems away in some dive in New York. Now our brash Brit is so shit faced that he doesn't even realize that a waitress who out of the blue headbutts him, is actually his old teammate Deadman looking for a little payback for leaving everyone high and dry in Nanda Parbat, oh and I guess for locking his soul inside The Sea King's body. But our lovable Deadman decides to leave John in the gutter he's placed himself in, and goes back to check on the rest of his team in The House of Mystery.
If you recall from the end of the last issue Zatanna took over as owner of the House of Mystery, and kicked Constantine out, and I guess being a home owner isn't a total nightmare here since this special HQ knowing that Zatanna needed to relax built her a tropical bath house. Which is completely cool and all if it had only built a lock on the door, because Zatanna's relaxation is interrupted when Nightmare Nurse decides to take a bath with her. Yeah it's getting a little erotic, but you pervs put your tongues back in your mouth because all that happens in this scene is Nightmare Nurse lets her desire to stay with the team known, Zatanna wondering about who Nightmare Nurse really is, and Zatanna's quick exit after Nightmare Nurse's advances. Pervs.
Elsewhere in the House of Mystery Deadman is trying to convince Frankenstein and Black Orchid to stay with the team, but the two seem set in leaving after their experiences with Project Thaumaton. It's not that they blame the team for it, and they're very appreciative for getting them out, it just seems like a good time to leave the superheroing alone and focus on themselves for awhile. Hold on though, because all of a sudden a "Ding Dong" is heard throughout the House, and for the first time we find out that the House of Mystery actually has a doorbell. This doesn't really do anything to further the story, but the reactions from the characters were really funny. So Constantine's come home to talk to his lady love, and whatever's on his chest he plans on getting it off, even if he has to fight the entire JLD to do it, and you know what? That's exactly what he does. Constantine one by one takes down the entire group until Zatanna finally tells him that they can talk. Holy shit John is a badass. Only if he wasn't a total ass hat, we'd have a superhero to contend with the likes of Superman.
In the end Constantine says his apologies and kisses Z goodbye, Zatanna summons Swamp Thing to see if he will join the JLD full time, because now we're down to just Zatanna, Deadman, and Nightmare Nurse so the team could really use the muscle. Now before Swamp Thing can get all swampy mad about being summoned like Constantine once did to him, Nightmare Nurse spontaneously combusts and scares the shit out of everyone. When the fire subsides we're left with a woman claiming to be Alice Winter, who appears to be who Nightmare Nurse once was. It's strange since Zatanna planned on finding out who Asa really was, we started seeing what looked like a 20's flapper ghost throughout the House of Mystery, and now we have Nightmare Nurse gone, and this woman in her place. Did the House of Mystery facilitate it's new owner's curiosity? Well we'll have to find out next time, so make sure to be back here in a month so we can find out together.
Bits and Pieces:
Now I'm not going to pull any punches here. I'm going to tell you without any restraint that this is one of the best issues of Justice League Dark I've ever read. Oh god it was so good. Not only are all these characters completely realized by DeMatteis, but they seem real, and you believe everything they tell you. Even with all the fluffing I'm doing to DeMatteis, that's nothing compared to my man crush on Andres Guinaldo after reading this issue, and I sincerely hope that he continues on JLD in the future. Now I've seen his work plenty of times in the past, but for some reason his style for the Dark characters fits perfectly, and these two creators joined together to make the Voltron of creative teams. If you miss this issue, then I feel sorry for you, because it's so damn good.
9.5/10
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