Art by: Cliff Richards
Cover Price: $2.99
Release Date: October 9, 2013
Your Katana is such a Bad Wife...
I'm going to try my best to sum up the events of this book. Seriously, I will not make anything up. OK, here goes.
Shun the Untouchable is covered in tattoos that tell of events that may come to pass. On her stomach is a tatoo of Katana and a Dragon. It means Katana will destroy the World. Funny, it looks like Katana and a Dragon to me, but I guess they know better. Katana has to fight a master of a sword that coils. His name is Coil. No, not making this up. He may be the worst trash talker in the history of trash talking. Seriously, one of his big ones is telling Katana that her Husband said she burned toast. Again, not making it up. She beats him, but only after calling him a clucking hen.
For the next test, she must kill Mona Shard at the Wayward Ship Graveyard. Sounds like a real fun place to hang out. Meanwhile, Mona takes over a little girl's body and starts punching the sand in a bucket to make her new little girl body one big scar. Alrighty then.
We cut to Shun and Katana walking in the streets of Japantown wondering why people are staring at them. Let me think, one of you is covered head-to-toe in tattoos and the other is dressed in armor, carrying a sword and wearing a Rising Sun mask. Shun tells a story that makes no sense at all and then they are attacked by a falcon.
Suddenly they are both on a mountainside. I have no clue how they got there. Really, I have no idea. A Falconer arrives and tells Katana to let the bird trust her and then she can kill it. Then he says if she wants more lessons find him on the Mountainside sometime. What Falconer tells someone how to kill his bird. Those Falcons take years of training. I always thought there would be a bond between the bird and the trainer. I guess I was wrong...dead wrong.
Next, a Sumo wrestler is possesed by a spirit because he is a "mountain of will and fat". Exact words.
Then, Shun thanks Junko for building her a foot. Katana asks Junko if she has to kill Mona Shard. He says she will find out. Way to go out on a limb there, buddy. The book ends with Mona Shard about to kill a Dagger Clan thug who has an idea on making money selling monkeys to science labs.
This may be the funniest book ever made. Ann Nocenti is a diabolical genius. I would say you have to buy this and read it for yourself, but isn't that Ann's plan all along? Diabolical Genius, I tells you. Diabolical Genius!
1.5/10
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