Art By: Ivan Reis
Cover Price: $3.99
Release Date: October 23, 2013
Ultra Man's Pal, Jimmy Olsen. Don't Be Ultra Man's Pal
Alright we can get this story going. Even thought there are a million tie-ins, this issue finally feels like we're getting things going. It really should feel like Forever Evil's doing that, but I don't know. This issue is just Boom, take that. Anyway lets get to it.
Explain It!:
We start this issue, with a dying Krypton. But wait this isn't the Krypton we're used to. People are rushing escape pods like the doors of a Best Buy on Black Friday. Until Jor-Il starts blasting away to make sure that his son get's to escape. Lara and Jor-Il place their little Kal-Il in the pod, and tell their little baby what every son wants to hear. "You're a disappointment, and you're weak."
So we find out in this crazy not so bizarro universe, that they loaded the pod with Kryptonite that will make their son strong, and be able to easily rule over Earth, but that the yellow sun, will hinder the effects of the Kryptonite. So lil' Kal travels through space, getting the education that we've seen before, with some more loving comments from his father wrapped around it.
On Earth the Kent's are having a family discussion about Johnny Kent being a poor excuse for a man, and Martha snorting all the farm's income. Breaking Bad: Smallville. Pretty much the space ship lands, lil' Kal exits and proclaims after burning Johnny Kent's hand off, that they will be his parents. Fast forward a bit, and we see that Ultra Man killed his foster parents, killed the president, and started the Crime Syndicate.
Now in the present, back to the present, forward to the present? Grid's being all Grid about it, telling Ultra Man all about what's going on in the world, and telling him what the rest of the Crime Syndicate's up to, and we are told about a group of superheroes causing a ruckus. Oooooo, it's about time. The Doom Patrol. Now that the name has been said, I expect to see their title soon. I don't care if it isn't planned, or isn't ready, I expect it now, or next month. I just want it. DC you started this, now make it happen. Alright so Ultra Man's is supposed to go to Kahndaq, but wants to check out somethings in this world, to see how much of a difference there is between his world, and ours. So lets go to the Daily Planet. Everyone at the planet are scrambling to get out, except Lois of course. But they didn't get out in time. Dun Dun Duuuun! Ultra Man comes busting in.
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| MAKE IT GO AWAY! |
So they don't come right out and say exactly what Ultra Man's pal Jim Olsen was in Earth 3, but it sounds like he took pictures, and blackmailed you. Now our sweet Jimmy isn't like this at all so, Ultra Man breaks his hand. After that he's going to do some awful things to Lois, but before he can, Grid lets him know that his target in Kahndaq is coming to him. Black Adam busts in and takes Ultra Man down. But when Black Adam tries to rip him limb from limb, he finds out that his is going to be a tough job. In the end Black Adam is batted away like a annoying fly, or like that StarVista China Beach Season 1 commercial that plays nonstop On Demand. Please Ultra Man please make those commercials stop. PLEASE!
Bits and Pieces:
This issue shows us how good we have it with Ma and Pa Kent, man did we get spoiled. We are finally shown the origin for Ultra Man, and the idea of Superman as a bad guy is a terrifying notion. That's why it works so effectively in Injustice, and here with Ultra Man. Seeing the parallel between our hero, and him is really effective story telling, and makes you glad we happen to live our fantasy lives here in Earth 1. Geoff Johns is really taking this event to the extremes and giving us things that I didn't even know I wanted. If Geoff is whispering terror in our ear, then Ivan Reis is punching us in the gut and hammering the story home, with this beautifully drawn book. Wow. I need the next issue now. So go get this book, so you can go through withdrawal like me.
9.5/10
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